Bard

       I, Gordon the VI son of Gordon from the town of Gordenton from the far lands of Gordonia, have told many stories in my time; ones of heroes slaying dragons, and of the great battles of my ancestors. I have taken the lore of my land and made it my trade; stories of tragic endings and happy beginnings, bringing laughter and tears to my audience as I sing my songs. Never, have I shared a story of my own, a tale I should think not quite like any other. What's that? Oh, you say you want to hear my tale. Well...now listen up, because I'm going to tell it once.
              Are you listening?
              Just making sure because its an important story, probably the best that was ever told.
         It begins with me, in the city of Porticullis, where I have been sent to achieve my citizenship by my guild of jongleurs from my home town, Gordenton. "No one will hear you sing stories if you aren't a citizen of the realm, and I won't have you singin' to bugger penniless thugs. If you are your father's son you will be singin' for kings and queens. Don't you come back til' ya do!" He no less than kicked me out of my town with a boot to my rear than I was off with my harmonica to find the beautiful city of Porticullis, what a sight it is.
     The sheer enormity of it overwhelmed me right away. Took me a half a days trek just to find the keep through the maze of streets that were filled to the brim with trade and all kinds of people; short ones with beards, long ones with pointy ears, and colorful ones with green or red scales on their skins. I knew at once that this was a place where tales of adventure began and I decided to make this city my muse.
    Everyone from all reaches of the realm have come to this tremendous city to give their services up in hopes for a citizenship like myself. We all stayed in the great keep where we could train while we waited to get picked by the magistrates to become citizen patrol and start our service. By training I mean getting real drunk and finding the FINE establishments of "service". Or as my old man would say, whore houses.
     There was supposed to be a ceremony where a few of us get picked to start the path to citizenship and become a part of the city watch or something to that effect anyway. I have gone to six of these ceremonies already, watching as that menacing wolf of Thea's, one of the master trainers, choose those of whom I thought were people of much lesser value than myself. I became unsure of how to prove that I was the greatest most spectacular bard in the realm or would be someday soon. Back in my hometown of Gordenton, I was held with a bit of prestige by the people's knowledge of my father, Gordon the Remarkable, and my grand father before that, Gordon the Wonder, and on it went down my family line that was full of famous performers. I was currently toying with name Gordon the Stupendous or Magnanimous. Perhaps a combination of those; Gordon the Stupendously Magnanimous.
     I, Gordon the VI, son of Gordon, sat quietly in the courtyard digging at the grass by my feet as the drums for the ceremony began. The three master trainers of the keep marched up on stage. Three braziers were placed in front of them, each lit with flame in remembrance of the three heroes that saved our realm from the dark days in the time of King Raxseus' reign. I dosed off somewhere after Uday, the warrior trainer, spoke in his thunderous voice, about the war three hundred years ago.....
         When a low growl stirred me, I opened my eyes staring straight into the glowing golden ones of Thea's wolf. A white flame burst around my head like a crown but the fire did not burn me. A little dazed, I saw the others that had the same flame round their heads were shuffling to the front of the stage to take up their emblems. I hurried to get away from the wolf that had finally chosen me after all this time. Quickly I stood in a line behind a very curious assortment of six others. The one next to me had pointy ears and a black and purple magus robe billowed about him. I noticed immediately something was different about him, the effeminate way he held himself, the way he must have spent hours keeping his hair looking the way it was, and most of all... those well kept nails as though he'd never touched even a spoon to feed himself. My hair is much more lustrous with its perfectly quaffed curls falling around my face like a halo and all I have to do is roll out of bed. I stand taller and square my shoulders with my chest slightly puffed out. First impressions is everything in my line of work and I knew its importance would come handy now as I stand before these six others I'll be joined with. A leader must make himself known straight away with his mere presence.
       Before we could take our emblem the band of people that had been chosen before us in the last few ceremonies stepped up to claim their citizenship. I noted that each of these groups had considerably fewer numbers than they first started with, and I began to wonder if my guild master had sent me to my death. When it was my turn to take my emblem it showed the head of a wolf on its smooth surface. Thea told me to put my hand into the fire of the first brazier. I looked at her for a moment until her austere expression gave me no hint of a jest and then placed my hand into the flame. At first it felt warm and then suddenly hot but not like how fire should have been hot, only so that my hand felt sweaty. Luckily I was the last one, as I knocked over the brazier with my Gordonian swagger. Thea lost that smirk, but I gained mine.
          Thea congratulated us, her olive skin stretching with a smile. I noted that she did not smile often so this custom of us earning a right to become a citizen of the realm must be of some importance to her. She wore vines and deer hide that traveled up her lithe body and her long dark hair had been pushed back into many braids with small trinkets and beads woven into them. We took our leave deciding that we should all have a tankard of ale to commemorate our companionship. I found I rather much enjoyed the company of the wizard once I saw he was more merry than I had first thought. I'm not implying that there wasn't still something not quite right about the man because there definitely was. I could hear it in his squeaky laugh of his. However,  The ranger and the pirate named, Caerulean, I found were good company as well, and gave me a run for my money whilst drinking themselves into a stupor. I tried to get the big scary male dragon born to join in but after a few mugs of ale he retired. I would break him into joining us soon enough and added it as one of my many missions for the near future. There was a cleric of Pelor in our group whose disposition seemed cheery when otherwise trying to talk to us about her god of light. I don't think she liked the jest I made about her odd beliefs, but it was hard to take her seriously having all the child like features of being a halfling. After another pint, I decided to retire to my room at the keep and jumbled a tune as I swayed and bumped my way back through the streets.
         The next morning the sun woke me rudely, shining through the little slit that was my window in my room. I threw some cold water over my face from the basin and gulped down the rest. I had to run down to the courtyard almost late to the meeting with my group and the frightening Thea that gave us a sour look as we approached. She must have gathered how our celebrations had went down last night by the way half of us squinted under the sting of the sun's rays. Also, I was sure her elvish nose could probably smell the ale on our breaths. I happened to think our celebrations went splendidly although she may disagree so I decided to distract her with the business at hand. As no one seemed to be speaking up right away, I took my companions silence as a consent in offering the leadership of this group to myself. Strutting forward I took a bow though still slightly unstable from my previous night of much merriment, I stumbled slightly in doing so.
          "We are at your service my lady, what can we do for you?"
          "I did not expect to have need for your services quite so soon. I fear that some of the children have gone missing over at the orphanage of Pelor on the far west side of the city. There you will find Priestess Beatrice who cares for the children there. Talk to her and find the missing children." Thea seemed withdrawn and left our presence without another word. The woman was obviously in need of my expertise merriment making. I shrugged and led my group to the orphanage whilst whistling a tune called The Hairy Maiden. I noticed a fair more people waving or nodding our way now that we bore the badges of citizen patrol. I wondered if I would get more coin for my songs now that people new that I was on my way to citizenship. Who knew that such a common task would be held with such high regard. I suppose my guild master knew or I wouldn't be here now, standing in front of the orphanage flashing my badge proudly for all to see.
     Children buzzed around the run down building like bees around their hive. One of them ran away from us calling out his priestess's name in a boisterous manner and was joined by some of the other kids near by. Another boy stood sheepishly at Caerulean's side pointing at his weapons and asking all the annoying questions that children like to ask. After a long moment a woman with long black hair wearing the white robes of a Pelor Priestess came through the door way to greet us.
       "By Pelor's light, I am so relieved to see you here. Its already been five days time since one of the children went missing. I thought the keep would never send anyone. After all its not exactly out of the ordinary for orphan children to just up and run away but one after another and so close together like this caught me as a bit strange. I've been beginning to noticed that the children's behavior has changed. Not during the day mind you, they are as rambunctious as ever! But at night they seem to all have terrible nightmares and some cry all night long." I followed her in peering around at all the kids that seemed to be gathering, the curiosity of our presence apparent by in their avid expressions. Inside was a little chapel with pews, the wood splintering in some places. Water stains on the ceiling made long orange and brown rings on the white stone. This place was practically in shambles for all the kids looking well fed and decently clothed. I guess they had the right priorities at least.
      "Sister Beatrice do not be afraid, Pelor will shine his light upon this mystery. Do you mind at all if we look around?" The halfling took her sister's hands in her own giving comforting words of their god to one another. I find it strange to feel solace in something that only exists in one's mind. The only solace I needed that I couldn't from ale was in my harmonica. I could see already that I had an audience, their tiny eyes peeking over the backs of the pews or poking around the corners of the room. I blew a small, high-pitched note, and then another, and another. I hopped once and then again, drawing out a tiny giggle from somewhere behind me. After a few more notes I drew the little tikes in closer for a performance. I glimpsed my companions dispersing to search for clues of the missing children, but I knew these kids needed their spirits lifted and after all that was my business.
      Sometime after I finished my ballad about Sir Shamaeus and the Bear, the little cleric appeared from having searched upstairs in the kids' sleeping quarters. She told Caerulean, who had stayed here by my side, that a girl had been babbling about the dark men that come in the night to kidnap them. A most vague and frankly unhelpful piece of evidence as "dark" could mean a variety of things such as; if the men were darkly clothed, or dark skinned. Perhaps the child described these men as "dark" simply because they chose to come in the dark of night, who could tell the minds of children. I shrugged and strutted out the door to find what my other comrades have found. The halfling and Caerulean, obviously following my lead as their leader, joined me in my doing so.
      Round the back I spied the two dragon born staring intently at the back wall as if it were the most interesting, and fascinating script in all the realm. I raised a quizzical brow. Thinking it best not to interrupt the beasts inspection of brick and mortar, I strode over to the ranger who seemed to have an inkling at what he was doing.
        "Have we found anything worth a pence?" I asked.
        "Some one has been dragged along here and here." Rolan, our ranger, obliged to show me the marks he found with his two forefingers.
         "No foot prints though, other than the small ones of the children running around of course." He finished in his low hoarse voice that made him seem so ominous to others.
           "Odd." I said simply.
           "Look up here." Captain Caerulean had managed to climb up one of the trees. His face screwed up at the sight of something I thought must be revolting. He came down and described to us the sticky sort of mess he found up there but it was no use as he forgot to bring some of the mysterious substance down with him. Up he climbed again this time remembering to bring with him a piece of the material that he had stuck to a twig he brought down. Rolan seemed to be the only useful brain in our group as he recalled that it was spider's silk. This caused some concern to me since the pirate described that the tree was indeed filled with it. How many spiders could it take to fill the top of a tree with so much web, and if it were spiders who had made this then why didn't Caerulean see any while he was up there? A most boggling piece of information, though, I am not at all sure what spiders had to do with kidnapped orphan children?
        "There is web trailing from the tree to this shed. Look here, there are gobs of it hanging down from its edge." The cleric observed and Maleficent the dragon born barbarian kicked open the shed door to have a closer look. I did not see any need to do so and stood over by another of the several trees my spry companion had chosen to climb to gain a better view of the area.
        "Anything good Captain?" I called up after him brushing some leaves and twigs that had fallen into my lustrous golden hair from his climb.
         "Not much just a big hole in their roof. I think their is more web trailing from this tree to the building though." He scurried back down and I told the group to check the attic of the building for any spiders. The halfling was the only one of us that could fit into the attic and with no spiders to be seen we went out to the back again among the trees.
         "We must be dealing with spiders and the size of their web tells me these aren't the cute ones."
         "There are cute ones?" The cleric remarked.
        "As I was saying I have heard of spiders of unusual sizes, some as big as we are. We may be dealing with those." Rolan sighed heavily. I gave the group a moment for them to fully grasp what was at hand and pulled out my harmonica.
           "Well the spiders have to come back sometime and since its obvious they come here through the trees...."
            "These are filthy creatures of the darkness they can't stand the light that Pelor gives to us everyday. They'll be back by tonight if what Sister Beatrice says is true. She said a child goes missing every night." The cleric chimed in rudely overstepping me as her leader. I let this pass as I was in a good mood and we had just started our journey together as comrades. I was sure the tiny thing would not last too long anyway. I saw plenty groups who had been chosen for this job and every time they returned it seemed like they were fewer and fewer. Certainly the halfling would be the first to go. I let my companions argue over what to do. Some suggested to wait up on the roof, or up in the trees. Night would be falling soon and I had promised some of the children that I would play my harmonica for them before then. I remembered the tales of old when the heroes would courageously step forward brandishing their weapon and sleighing the beast in a bold gesture of kill or be killed. I knew what had to be done.
             "Rolan if you would be kind enough to make a fire here in the clearing by tonight we should wait here for the foul creatures to come upon us. Since we hardly know exactly what we are dealing with, all of you should hide surrounding this area and I will lure them to this spot with my harmonica. Though they won't understand the words I will sing A Call to Battle. Until then I suggest you prepare yourselves." The cleric gave me a weary look as she passed me by and laid down for a rest. I must have overwhelmed my comrades by my selflessness as they had no words for my sacrificial plans to bait the spiders using myself and my instrument. They shook their heads in what I only could know to be sorrow or guilt for not having as much bravery as I.
           The rest of the day went by slowly and I followed the sun's path across the sky until it fell beyond the horizon. The sky, darkening from pale blue to a deep violet hue of an iris blooming in the spring. I changed my tune to the Call of Battle. The song would give my comrades twice the strength they have for when the spiders come. Came they did, and as big as four feet. I almost did not see them until one was upon me, hissing its nasty venomous breath my way.
      I ducked as it flew passed me right over the fire, its fangs like daggers wriggled trying to get at me. As I was somewhere between pissing myself and completely stunned still by its marvelous size and hideous gnashing fangs, Caerulean came at its back with his rapier. This made the eight legged monster whip around sinking its fang into his leg before he could blink. Something hot went passed me and I turned to see a stream of flame coming from that tiny halfling who stood on the branch of a tree with her hand held outwards where the flame was streaming from. The river of fire consumed another of the three creatures surrounding us. Its shrill shrieks stung my ears close to deafening them. Rearing backwards, its four front legs flailed in the air and then the beast took off with incredible speed towards the city wall. Then the third spider came up toward Caerulean who now became trapped between two of the giant eight-legged things.
      The fierce female barbarian ran up to the third beast that was ready to attack Caerulean and with a loud battle cry she brought her maul down just nearly missing the beast and getting flung aside by one of its giant spindly legs. Seeing his dragon born sister being flung, Jörg, with the silver scales, brought down his great sword upon the beast squashing it with a sickening crunch. The black ichor splattered through the air covering the maddened silver scaled Jörg. Seeing my companions vigor I stepped forward to pierce the spider that towered over me and ended up with its fang stuck in my leg. I cried out and felt something soft and warm form around my body. For a moment I thought I saw the sun and I knew somehow there was a glow emanating from my body protecting me from harm. I looked to the halfling who gave me a small salute. Perhaps she was of little use after all.
       A large boulder in front of Maleficent suddenly opened like a lid to the earth. I could see the flash of beady eyes and two fangs. One of Rolan's arrows went between the crack but it didn't seem to do much damage to it as it stayed alert. In a flash something white spewed out from beneath the rock and my eyes rounded at the sight of Maleficent wrapped in one big gob of it sticky white silk. Then it started to reel her in like a fish on a hook. Her struggle was futile against the strength of its web. Behind me I heard chanting from the mage and seconds later some sort of magical projectiles whooshed over my head, so close I crouched a little as they passed over my head and darted straight into the spider in the hole. The rock slammed back down allowing Maleficent to break free of the web that trapped her. I watched as rage took her. Her eyes seemed wild and her scales gleamed a deep green as her veins protruded on her muscular arms. The rock came back up but Maleficent didn't give the spider a chance to attack again before shoving her mace into the hole with a loud squish.
      Caerulean clutched at his bleeding leg still facing off with the third spider and took a swipe at it with his blade. He slashed off one of the legs and Rolan came from behind a tree and stung it in the abdomen with his blade. I peered around trying to find any signs of hidden eyes or skittering shapes in the shadows. Up high on the city wall thirty feet from the boulder was the spider attempting to get to the river that I knew was beyond the wall to put out the flames that ate at its flesh. It was too late as the flames from the halfling had burned its way though its living carcass and I watched as it fell backwards off the wall crumpling into a crispy ball of charred spider corpse and boiling ichor. I felt my innards roiling but refused to regurgitate in front of my fellow warriors knowing that it was essential for their leader to inspire them with bravery. We all looked at one another then as something strong passed between all of us at having won our first victory with blood being spilt on both sides...or ichor rather. My heart was thrumming with the rhythm of a new song.